-
I'm not aging, I just need re-potting.
-
I don't repeat gossip, so listen carefully.
-
Lord, if I can't be skinny, let all my friends be fat.
-
My idea of cleaning the house is sweeping the floor with a glance.
-
I cleaned my house yesterday. Sure wish you could have seen it.
-
This isn't clutter; these are my antiques!
-
Discover wildlife! Have kids!
-
Our policy is to always blame the computer.
-
Your secrets are safe with me and all my friends.
-
Take my advice. I'm not using it!
-
Mom, I'll always love you, but I'll never forgive you for cleaning my face with spit on a hanky.
-
I love to give homemade gifts... umm, which one of the kids would you like?
-
By the time you find greener pastures, you can't climb the fence!
-
This house is protected by killer dust bunnies.
-
Every time I get the urge to exercise, I lie down till the feeling passes.
-
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
TODAY's Thought: Daily Devotional 
