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Building Your Husband's Self Esteem

by Katherine Kehler 

 “Her husband has full confidence in her. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life” (Proverbs 31:11, 12).

One sunny afternoon, the mayor of a town and his wife were strolling down the main street. As they walked, he proudly pointed out all the changes that had occurred since he had taken office. Passing a construction site, he was startled when a workman called out and greeted his wife. She explained that he had been a high school boyfriend.

Looking at his wife, the mayor said, “See, dear, if you had married him, you would be the wife of a laborer.” “No, honey,” she answered sweetly. “If I had married him, he would be the mayor.”

It is true. Wives have a phenomenal influence on their husbands. It is said that a wife can make or break her husband. Even though we often don’t feel like we are making any difference at all, we really are. Someone said, “If wives knew how much influence they had, they would be filled with pride. If men knew, they would be scared to death.”

So how can wives use their influence to build their husbands’ self esteem? (By self-esteem, I mean how you mentally see yourself, how you feel about yourself, and what value or sense of worth you have internally.)

Some husbands have suggested effective methods. Why don’t you try some of them?

1.     Pray for him.

2.     Give verbal and written words of encouragement: “You handled that wisely.”

 " I love being married to you.”

3.     Express confidence.

4.     Be loyal. Loyalty builds confidence.  

5.     Compliment the little things he does — in front of others and privately. Mark Twain said, “I can live two months on a good compliment.”

6.     Make his favorite meals.

7.     Be an available and active lover.

8.     Remind him of his personal strengths and accomplishments.  

9.    Respect and admire him .

10.  Take responsibilities seriously and carry them out.

Ruth Graham said, “It is not up to me to change my husband: that is up to God. My job is to keep him happy.”


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